Google Adwords and the Mysterious Case of the Phantom Billing System

Well I’m having second thoughts about staying long with my google stock. I just finished a chat with a google adwords tech, and my faith in the company is, eh, not what it used to be.

I started telling my story here in detail but just realized that the chat log pretty much summarizes things.

Thank you for contacting Google AdWords. Please hold a moment while we route your chat to a specialist who will help you with your question: “Enabled ads last thurs and they still are not running. Dont know what I need to do to get them going. “.
TechDude: Hello Boomhauer. Thanks for contacting Google AdWords. I’m happy to help you.
Boomhauer: thanks
TechDude: For account verification purposes, can you please give me your customer ID number?
Boomhauer: sure, it is (number here)
Boomhauer: I was added to this account by (my associate)
TechDude: Would you mind waiting a moment while I pull up your account?
Boomhauer: please do
Boomhauer: ive waited 4 days already
TechDude: thanks for waiting.
TechDude: I see that the card you have on file has not been charged successfully on a previous occasion and this is the reason your ads are not running.
TechDude: You will need to update your payment details for your ads to run.
Boomhauer: (my associate) just updated the card details, we have a new address for the card. it is a valid card.
Boomhauer: what do we need to change to force it to start running again?
Boomhauer: very frustrating that the system doesnt tell me a reason the ads are not running.
Boomhauer: i had hoped to get a lot of the july 4th weekend traffic to our site, but we were unable to do this, and not even told why.
Boomhauer: i waited all weekend for the ads to go live.
TechDude: I understand your situation. Just re-submitting the card details should enable the system to validate your card.
Boomhauer: should he remove the card and re-add it?
Boomhauer: becuase he already edited the card info last week.
TechDude: yes, removing and then adding will help.
Boomhauer: ok.
Boomhauer: very dissappointed. will get this done.
TechDude: If you ace any more problems in doing this please feel free to chat in again.
Boomhauer: (my associate) is trying to remove and add the card back now, but all it lets him do is edit it, which he already did last week.
Boomhauer: so it sounds like he has already done what is needed.
Boomhauer: can you force the account to re-auth the card?
TechDude: In the edit option you can enter the new card details.
Boomhauer: he put the same card info back in, i think this is why it doesnt work.
Boomhauer: this is what he already used.
Boomhauer: several days ago
TechDude: yes, can you try using some other card please.
Boomhauer: that is our business card we use for everything. it is fine. we dont have another card to use.
Boomhauer: there is NOTHING wrong with this card.
Boomhauer: we buy (big money figure) of dollars of parts every week using it.
TechDude: Can you please try-re-entering all the details of this card again?
Boomhauer: will do right now.
TechDude: It seems that this card had expired sometime back.
Boomhauer: (late month)/09 is the expiration
TechDude: If you have renewed this card then please be sure to change the expiry date in AdWords account.
TechDude: To update your payment information, please follow these steps:
TechDude: 1. Sign in to your AdWords account at (link here)
TechDude: 2. Select the ‘My Account’ tab.
TechDude: 3. Click ‘Billing Preferences’.
TechDude: 4. Edit your primary and backup card information. Be sure to enter
TechDude: your payment details, including card number and new expiration date, accurately.
TechDude: 5. Click ‘Save Changes’.
Boomhauer: Im looking at it right now- it already says expiration is (late month) 2009!!!
Boomhauer: it is NOT expired
TechDude: Can you please re-enter all the details again following the steps I have given.
Boomhauer: why?? it already has the right expiration!
Boomhauer: something is broke on google’s side. Im tired of trying to debug it for you.
Boomhauer: i wasted all weekend on this.
Boomhauer: look at the account. tell me what expiration date you see.
Boomhauer: it is (that month again) 2009.
Boomhauer: it is correct.
Boomhauer: it is not expired.
TechDude: Boomhauer, sometimes re-entering the billing information helps.
Boomhauer: the frustrating part is, as a tech support person, apparently you cant fix this? you need me to “try” something and just hope?
TechDude: can you do that please/
Boomhauer: yes ill do it.
TechDude: Please note that our billing process is automated and is done by the system.
Boomhauer: apparently it is broke.
Boomhauer: please pass this chat on to your superiors and let them know of my frustration.
TechDude: If your account is still not active within a couple of hours please contact us again.
TechDude: I will inform the concerned team regarding the issue you are acing.
Boomhauer: fine. Ill beg google to take my money
Boomhauer: thank you for the help
TechDude: I apologize for your frustration.
TechDude: You’re welcome.
TechDude: It was a pleasure chatting with you. If you have any more questions, please feel free to visit our Help Center.

Slightly off topic, but why has every liveperson implementation Ive seen done with any larger company seem to be a token gesture not meant to give any results? Comcast comes to mind… I feel like “hey, you could call us and spend 2 hours on the phone and finally find someone who can help you… Or, just click this button and we’ll quickly give you a warm body with no power to solve any issue you have, but youll feel better after punching capslock and unloadingsyour frustration”. So far, liveperson is batting zero for me.

Google, please fix this. I wasted a chunk of my july 4th weekend doing everything I could think of to try to get my new ads running and attempt to get some sales from all the customers where were off for a long weekend… a good portion of which I imagine were on the web, buying my competitor’s inferior products (competitors: you know i’m just kidding about that inferior part, right?).  If my credit card is having problems, let me suggest a notification: “Attention: your credit card is unable to be charged and requires updating”. See how that works?

And if that is too difficult, could you maybe consider giving your support guys the power to actually fix something? I don’t need virtual handholding.

I never imagined I’d have to work so hard to give someone my money.

Debug Windows Mobile with webservices on localhost using Visual Studio Web Development Server and Fiddler

This has frustrated me for a while, but seems I found a solution this evening.
I build a lot of Compact Framework apps which communicate via webservices with an asp.net webservice. During development, I prefer to use the built-in web development server instead of having to mess around with IIS etc.

The problem: the web dev server only allows connections from “localhost”, which doesnt include your dev pda, assuming you are using activesync. Long story, but even though the pda can browse the web using your desktop’s ip, it has it’s own local ip which makes the dev web server think it is a remote connection. Thus is winds up blocked.

Solution seems to be, download this tool: www.fiddlertool.com
Fiddler is a local proxy which is used for debugging http connections, and is normally used along with asp.net development.

You can disable the logging in fiddler so we’re just using it as a local proxy.

On your windows mobile device, add an http proxy to the connection settings. Use port 8888 (the fiddler default), and use ppp_peer as the host name. Im told that windows mobile 5 and greater use dtpt_peer instead, but I havent tested this yet.

NOW: when you wish to connect to a locally hosted web app or web service from the pda, use this:

localhost.:1234/path.asmx

where 1234 is your port number and.. you get the idea. *But* notice the single “.” after localhost. This is the magic that makes this work. How? Well, I’ve fought this battle long enough, discovering why is a luxury I don’t have at the moment.

To Catch A Geek: Texas to Jail Computer Techs

Texas, of whom I am usually proud to call myself a native, somehow managed to pass one of the stupidest laws I’ve heard of in a while. If you work in computer service and repair (cough*geek*cough), you now are required to either have a criminal justice degree or a private investigator license. A CJ degree of course is 4 years, and a PI license takes at least 3 years of training to obtain. Punishment can be up to $4000 fine and imprisonment , and – get this – even a customer of such services can face the same punishments, even just for SOLICITING work from an “unqualified” geek.

Think about this. How many members of your local geeksquad, or your neighborhood ‘pooter geek, are going to have these qualifications? NONE.

Then also think about this: I don’t want to bash law enforcement, but think about the people you know with CJ degrees. Either cops, or college athletes who didn’t know what to take. Ok that was a bit harsh, but seriously, these are the guys we have to rely on to fix our PC’s for the next 3 to 4 years while the “real” geeks get “educated”? Refer to Zoolander clip.  (sorry, couldnt figure out how to embed this one..)

Texas has very few restrictions on gun ownership, and allows carrying a concealed weapon after taking a class that lasts all of 4 days (last I checked). Only in Texas: 4 days to be packin’ heat, 4 years to help your gramma find her missing recipes file.

There’s at least one lawsuit already in progress over this, from the good guys at the Institute for Justice. This link describes more about the law and what they are doing to fight it. I can’t remember the last time I called lawyers “good guys” but I wish them luck in reversing this stupidity.

Of course there is that silver lining… now when your friends ask you for help with their PC, you have a  reusable excuse instead of having to invent a new one every time.

Scratch your Car and Feel the Freedom!

A wise drunk weird crazy man once told me that the first thing he always did after buying a new truck was drive it through a bunch of brush to get some scratches on it. I was a kid at the time and thought this sounded crazy.

Now XX years later, I realize the wisdom in this.

My work truck is an old beat up Ford, which looks good overall for its age but has that spot where I nicked a mailbox, the dents from poorly-aimed firewood thrown in the bed, and the place where I kissed a wall in a parking garage (not due to unfamiliarity, but from trying to do 35 on a twisting ramp I had become too comfortable with…)

Last year I bought a new (to me) car which still had pristine paint, no dents, no scratches. And while it is a blast to drive, I found myself parking far away from other cars, and worrying about getting a nick or a scratch in the paint. However, when I drive my truck, I don’t have a care in the world.

Only about a month after owning it, a valet parked the car and backed it into a wall, creating a series of nice scratches on the back bumper. Of course I wasn’t excited about this, but I’ve realized since that those scratched has relieved me from the opression of perfection. Since that time, I’m no longer so worried about little nicks and dings from day-to-day use, and I’m now (at least closer to) enjoying the freedom from worry that I’ve enjoyed with my truck for so many years!

So apparently the crazy guy knew what he was talking about.

I’ve observed the opposite in action as well. An unnamed associate of mine is a wealthy business man who last year bought a very expensive luxury car. I’ve observed this normally relaxed individual become obsessive in his quest to keep the car in pristine condition. Not too long after purchase, the ”first scratch” appeared on a fender, inflicted by an unknown party. Instead of embracing the new freedom of imperfection, he took the car to the shop the same day to have it repaired, and continues to obsess over the car to this day.

Thus I propose the Scratch Your Car movement day month concept ritual. Anyone buying a new car should free themselves from the oppression of perfection by finding a creative way to “personalize” it and add their own first imperfections. Instead of dreading and being victimized this uncontrollable future event, embrace the process and take control of your life. Key yourself, bump into something (but not someone..), or find something really creative to do. You’ll simultaneously improve your life and create a good story to tell your friends.

And they’ll probably think you’re crazy too.

Nullable Datatables – another gripe

This is sorta old news, but my last Asp.net gripe put me in the mood to continue with another longer-term gripe I’ve had. Don’t misunderstand, I love .Net technology, but the few annoyances I have with the technology seem to drive me nuts.

So this time, I’m talking about datatables, and specifically strongly typed datatables via the new-as-of-2.0  DataTableAdapters.

Strongly typed datatables work fine when bound to .Net UI components such as asp.net or winform grids, because the binding mechanism knows how to check for null values in the table without blowing things up. This is accomplished via calling a IsColumnNameNull() method for each column in the table row, and then only accessed the column value if it is not null.

The new DataTableAdapters allow attaching sql queries directly to the strongly typed datatable, so these become a quick-n-dirty data access method for things beyond just binding to visual components. I’ve built numerous apps that work with these adapterd in business object layers that never see the UI. But the pain being that any time in code I wish to reference a column value, I am back to having to write code like this:

int? MyValue = SomeTableRow.IsSomeColumnNull()? (int?)null:SomeTableRow.SomeColumn;

or alternatively:

int MyValue = 0; //assign a default value
if(!SomeTableRow.IsSomeColumnNull())
    MyValue = SomeTableRow.SomeColumn;

Let’s do some math. If your table has 20 columns that are non-nullable (varchar/strings can be configured to not need this check), and your datatable is referenced in 10 places in your app, this is 200 places you have to write this mindnumbing code. My last database had about 10 tables to work with, so I could estimate I wrote this about 2000 times. And each one is unique, so you can’t cut an paste it very well (thank God for intellisense making this just a bit easier).

The bigger problem with this… the *HUGE* problem actually… is that if you don’t put this code in all the right places, you will produce an application that will compile fine but could have horrible bugs that may not show up for years. The following code compiles without problem:

int MyValue = SomeTableRow.SomeColumn;

SomeColumn is an int property on the datatable’s datarow, and thus the compiler sees no problem with this line of code. And if your database always has data in SomeColumn and never encounters a null, this will run fine.

However, if the column does allow nulls in the actual database, and a null winds up in there, this will throw an exception at runtime when this tried to access the null value.

With the release of Linq to Sql, we now have a easily generated object representation of the database tables similar to what the typed datatables used to provide. The linq versions support nullable fields, so that any database field is represented by a nullable version of the base type it represents. So now the equivalent code as above in using a linq table is:

int? MyValue = SomeTableRow.SomeColumn;

This sample uses a nullable int for MyValue, so that it will handle a null value just fine. But even if you want to keep the original non-nullable MyValue variable, you can still very easily do this:

int MyValue = SomeTableRow.SomeColumn.GetValueOrDefault();  

And this will use the nullable default method to return a default int value if it is null.

Not only are both of these nullable methods much cleaner and easier to use, the (again HUGE) benefit is that they are safe – if it compiles, it will not throw an exception at runtime… for nulls, anyway.

I had hoped that MS would add nullable column handling to these datatables in Visual Studio 2008 when it was released.. unfortunately not. And I’ve already had another project since 2008 release where I had to cuss my way through a huge pile of IsColumnNull()’s and the subsequent app blowups from the ones I managed to miss. I know developers have been asking Microsoft to add this feature for a long time, and it’s not a difficult thing to do, PLUS it adds so much safety to the compiled code… If this is good enough for Linq to Sql, why not for out trusty old DataTables? I don’t understand why this has dragged on so long.

ASP.Net formview – gripe of the day

I upgraded an asp.net project today to switch from a DetailsView control to a FormView control. Obviously I needed editing capabilities, thus the reason.

The upgrade reminded me of a major gripe I have with the FormView control. When you associate the control with a datasource, it will auto-generate a tabular form view of your data, in a list of Name: Value format. Really what it is doing is just creating a quicky view of the fields in your datasource and throwing the generated fields into the 3 templates needed (ItemTemplate, EditTemplate, and InsertTemplate) so you can have them handy for all that extra formatting you are expected to want to perform.

One formatting difference between the auto-generated code this control produces versus the format of the simpler DetailsView is, the DetailsView produces table elements so that all the “Name” elements show up in a single table column followed by the “Values” column. This is a nice formatted and is usually pretty close to what you would want to create in a list of values.

The FormView however assumes you are going to do a lot of editing of the templates, and so doesnt include any layout except the basics- Just the Name, “:” , and the bound feld value.  This results in the Name and Value getting bunched together up on the left side and results in a truly ugly form.

Not too difficult to format these into a table if you want to, right? Well sure… but after building a few apps using this, it can drive you nuts. Some of the apps Ive worked on have, say, an average of 30 fields to present on the screen. After I generate the FormView from the datasource, I then have to go add table TR/TD code around every element… 3 times. So those 30 elements are tripled to 90 elements. Each of the 90 elements has to have an opening TR/TD, then a middle TD/TD, then a finished TD/TR. So we are now looking at having to cut n paste about 270 items and try to make sure you didnt fubar anything.

To make things worse, if you make a schema change in your database (and who doesnt), you pretty much need to regen the thing and start over. 

AND: This is just ONE FormView. One app I recently finished had at least 20 FormViews in it. Neglecting any rebuilds, this is around 5000 elements I had to hand edit. Deadline? You talk funny.

I understand MS’es thinking in this, and I would probably be much worse off if I were in the other boat and had to *remove* all these unwanted table elements every time a Formview is generated… but why not offer an option to include a basic table formatting? Or even allow for custom formatting of the generated code so we can include our own tags or whatever markup is desired. I even researched to see if it’s possible to create my own generator for this to override or replace the one Visual Studio uses… found some obscure stuff but nothing really useful.

I’d like to hear if anyone has any pointers on this.

Linq and Sql Server Timestamp Columns – Why Binary?

As explained a bazillion times before on the net, the timestamp column in sql server is not a datetime or anything to do with time.  It is a binary(8) column which contains a big number which is incremented on every edit of any row of any table in the database. It is also identical to the rowversion column.

Now for my gripe. I’ve used strongly typed datatables in past projects and with some manipulation, you can get the datatable to treat the timestamp column as a bitint (Int64). Why does this matter? Because I’ve used it for some simple version tracking in the past, and this requires I perform range checking on these versions. A simplified explanation:

-Use the largest timestamp in my cached table
-Query the database table for any timestamps larger than this one
-Retrieve these new or updated items to be merged back into the original dataset

This normally is not useful for 2 or N tier apps, but in my instance I am transferring data over the net via a webservice so would like to only retrieve the new or changed records to the client.

Gripe time: why are these columns Binary? The only way I was historically able to query on them is to force sql server to cast them as a bigint, through some magic in the typed datatable. But now Im using Linq as my data access layer. I love linq so far, but I have tried every trick I can think of and it will not make this work- Linq will always fail with a illegal cast type error when it attempts to load the record.

So, whyt exactly are these binary? Wouldnt it be much easier to make use of rowversion and timestamps if they were represented as a real datatype like int64/bigint? I know I wouldnt have wasted half a day yesterday on this if this were the case.

So now it looks like Ill switch to using a datetime column that I hope is udpated with every edit or insert. Should work ok, but not my preference.

Fined for Handicapped Parking

Noticed at the park yesterday, a handicapped parking sign for a parking spot (I was stretching in front of it, no I didn’t park there.) In the smaller print, it said “Fine $50 - $200″. You’ve probably seen these around as well, and I know I’ve seen them for years.  

But then I thought… What determines whether the fine is on the $50 or the $200 end of the spectrum? Should I be glad or upset if I get a $50 fine? Imagining the cop’s train of thought: ”Yeah, this guy is in violation, but since he seems a bit mentally handicapped I’ll just give him the minimum fine.”

And what the heck are you to think if you got off with a warning?

Solar AC System?

One I was thinking of yesterday – a vented ridge cap on the top of a house’s roof will let hot air in your attic flow upward and out the top, drawing in cooler air along the eaves. So was wondering if home AC systems could use this airflow to draw air over the exterior coil and reduce the energy needed to run a fan. But a bad side effect would be adding extra heat to you your attic.

So the next thought was, just build either a series of “chimney” tubes, or even just join the tubes together to form a large thin chimney which could cover an entire wall of a house, and would let the hot air entering it from the bottom out of the AC coil to flow upward and pull more air through the system, thus again eliminating or reducing the need for a fan. This could also act as a sunshield for one side of a house, and the funny thing is sunlight would even enhance the effect (heating the chimney causes extra airflow).

So i did a quick search and confirmed my suspicion that this is old news..Patent 4706471 for a “Solar Chimney” uses solar energy to heat a chimney and produce airflow to aid in cooling an AC system, though this particular one seems to be focused on geothermal. (See http://www.google.com/patents?id=NsAwAAAAEBAJ&dq=4706471 ). This is after a 15 second search, so Im sure there is lots of other related tech out there. I may add more here as I find time to look into it.

 

The patented solution to the world’s energy problems (hint: not really)

This one has amazed me for a while, figured I would post it here.

Following is a patent, number 7095126, which was issued in 2006 for an energy creation device… first, take a look at some pictures:

 

What a great idea! In fact, I remember trying this one when I was a (really young) kid. I had a motor connected to the rear tire of my bicycle, and a generator hooked up to one of the tires (maybe it was the front tire, you know, since that might make it work better). The generator had gearing to spin it much faster than the motor, thus the bike should generate its own electricity and power itself.

It’s a barely genius idea, except of course it doesn’t work. It is a classical example of a free energy machine, also known as a perpetual motion machine.

So let’s review patent number 7095126. Electric motor, check. Generator, check. Gearbox to make the motor spin the generator faster. A battery to get things started. And a load to use all that extra electricity you will generate. A truly bare bones implementation of a perpetual motion machine, minus the usual clutter of obfuscation in an attempt to fool yourself or others into believing it really works.

Iv’e expressed frustration for years over what the patent office has become and the level of incompetence it has reached. It appears they will grant a patent on just about anything, unlike the rigorous and difficult path that washistorically required to obtain one. But even the PTO has specific rules regarding perpetual motion machines, specically that NO PATENTS BE GRANTED FOR THEM.

So, this means that the patent examiners either a. knew this was perpetual motion, and accepted it anyway, or even worse b. accepted it because they didnt recognize this as perpetual motion.

I propose that any future discussions or debates about the quality of work being produced by the US Patent Office, simple state “7095126″ followed by a “QED”. Nothing more need be said.